When I look back at my life six months ago, I am in total awe of where I am now, and how my life works now. I am a full time mother with two year old twins and a sixteen year old daughter.
I was struggling to keep up with my toddlers and banging my head against a brick wall with my teenage daughter. The stress was having a huge impact on my relationship of ten years. I turned up at a friends house one day in total breakdown, feeling that my life was falling apart and there was nothing I could do about it – total despair. She gave me a business card that has turned out to be the most precious gift she could have given me. The card said: RELATE, coaching that has you be the difference. I rang that number and Denise came to see me two days later.
Through Denise’s coaching I got to see that I am 100% committed to my family but I didn’t have the tools to be that commitment for them. I used to try and try to keep all members of my family happy, when someone wasn’t happy I’d make that mean I had failed and I’d get upset with that person for not being happy!!!! When I’d felt I’d failed I would throw my hands up in the air and think what’s the point and then go down a path of sabotage and self-destruction. Here I was doing everything I possibly could, putting myself aside, to keep everything fine and dandy and it still was not working. My teenage daughter still screamed and yelled at me, caused arguments and major upset in the household. Then my partner and I would turn on each other, and we’d go down a path of absolute turmoil time and time again. The impact of all this upset was impacting my babies too, it was heart breaking and I’d be screaming to myself IT’S NOT WORKING – I WANT TO RUN AWAY!!!!!!
The first night Denise came to see me, my partner was invited to stay in the room and listen to what Denise was about. He chose to take Denise on as his life coach also and we have never looked back.
Where do I start, we have totally transformed our lives together as a family, it is hard to put into a few sentences. Six weeks into our coaching we got MARRIED!!!! I am ongoingly creating a life I love. I now know how to be my commitment for my family that leaves them feeling unconditionally loved, nurtured and heard. I don’t make things mean something about myself – it is just what is so and who am I going to be in the matter. They now have the freedom to express all emotions that come up for them and I am committed to allowing them to have the space they need to grow.
In my marriage we have a whole new level of communication, I no longer try to make him happy by selling out on myself first, there is enough of everything to allow both of us to meet our needs and nurture ourselves. For myself I know that for my family to be happy, I need to be looking after myself and causing what I want in my life. And I am up to some BIG STUFF NOW!!! and I am no longer a DRAMA QUEEN!!! much to my husbands relief!
Being a mother now has a whole new meaning to me. While it still has its challenges, that’s all they are now – challenges, new opportunities. The tools I have now give me a whole new freedom around being a mother.
Through all my years of counseling and personal growth courses – and I’ve done a lot, I have never met anyone as committed and as powerful as Denise Simons. Your style in itself is unique Denise and I thank you for saving my family, my life. For being a stand for me, nurturing me to reach goals I never thought possible and teaching me a whole new world.
YOU ARE A GIFT.
Leianne